Wednesday, August 15, 2012

Best Practice: Tools and Tips for Divorced Parents and Divorce ...

Best Practice: Tools and Tips for Divorced Parents and Divorce Professionals: Do the unexpected

Do the unexpected


??? ??? A divorced mother was fed up with her ex-husband?s requests that she overlook his failure to pay child support on time or to pay his share of physician and extra-curricular expenses ? but she was even more fed up with their arguments about it. Perceiving that he was taking advantage of her, she usually reacted angrily, attacking his character and threatening court action.? He responded in kind, attacking her lack of charity and flexibility.? Their arguments were predictable and followed a set pattern ? like reading from a script ? and always ended when one or the other abruptly hung up.? She suspected that he provoked her to remain connected in a perverse way, but she always took the bait - and always regretted it.?
???What changed?? One day the mother paused before she responded to a request that she overlook yet another missed payment and then said calmly: ?Well, you?ve dug yourself quite a hole and I?m curious to see how you'll dig yourself out.? She didn?t say anything more.? The father, startled that she had not reacted as she had in the past, stammered and said: ?Well, I guess I?m curious as well how I;ll dig my way out.?? With nothing else to say, they ended the call calmly. Do the unexpected to get the unexpected.? ??

Source: http://aeschylus-otis.blogspot.com/2012/08/do-unexpected.html

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